Princess Errant: Duel dans la grande Gallium
A couple of days after the ball celebrating her Grand Tour, Princess
Dusk and her entourage set forth for Paris via clockwork ornithopter. The brass and glass airship (shaped like a
huge dragonfly) dashes across the Albion Channel at speeds of over 25 miles per
hour, reaching the airfield outside of Paris shortly after dark, just as the
gaslights of Paris light up the night.
A tremendous marching band parade greets the princess’
airship, and she is formally welcomed to the country by the Dauphine Celestine
(who offers Princess Dusk a 7% solution of cocaine once they’re safely
ensconced in her carriage). The dauphine,
Dusk soon realizes, plays at being weary and contemptuous of the spotlight but
truthfully glories in it, insisting that the travel-weary Dusk participate in a
grand ball welcoming her to Gallia. Dusk
reluctantly agrees and joins the riotous assemblage of Gallian nobles after
taking a brief break to freshen up and change.
Dauphine Celestine looks land acts nothing like Kill la Kill's Nui, but they're an awful lot alike anyway. |
(Gallia, unlike Albion, is ruled by hereditary nobility
(unlike the Albish adopted nobility); the royal house, which practices
primogeniture, traces its ancestry back to the water-fairy Melusine. Actual power was consolidated into the royal
hands by the current king’s grandfather, leaving the Gallian nobility as a
parasitical appendix, collecting rents from lands they no longer have any hand
in administrating while not paying any taxes into the nation’s coffers. While this aspect of them is offensive to
Albish principles, the Gallian nobility is paradoxically progressive in many
social issues, tolerating broader gender roles and sexual orientations than
most continental regimes. After all, the
heir to the throne is a woman…)
At the welcoming ball, there is an awkward moment as the
dauphine tries to (almost literally) push her teenaged brother François into dancing
the welcoming dance with Dusk (Celestine being rather narrow-mindedly
cisgendered), but the awkward young lad is saved by the intercession of the Marquis
Tomás de Carabas, a dashing ailuromorph.
While their initial encounter impresses Princess Dusk, subsequent
attempts by the cat-like Casanova to chat her up over the next few days fall
flat. She barely even takes any interest
in an assassination attempt against the marquis, chalking it up to the actions
of the brutal former marquis that Tomás cheated out of the title.
[This is an excellent example of why you have to be ready to improvise in
a duet campaign and also why I make it all up at the gaming table.]
The Marquis was somehow my least attractive Tennant character yet. |
Dusk is overall unimpressed by the Gallian nobility and longs to move out
of Versailles and stay in Paris, but Dauphine Celestine insists on having a
masquerade ball. Celestine also tries to
pawn Dusk off onto the innocent, fabulously rich, and unpopular young Comtesse Martine
le Blanc. Le Blanc, it turns out, has
suffered a series of near-fatal accidents recently, always being rescued in the
nick of time by her wolf dog Raoul.
The wolf dog piques Dusk’s curiosity by being obviously a wolf
smarter than average, but she’s still on the verge of blowing off the comtesse
as well when Chief Inspector Jacquard of the Sûreté arrives to announce he has received notice le
Blanc will be murdered at the masquerade.
Chief Inspector Jacquard |
Princess Dusk has already suspected that Martine’s would-be murderer is
her uncle, Merteuil, and is only persuaded to join the investigation because of
her curiosity about Raoul and Jacquard’s confession that he also resents his
nation’s nobility. Jacquard is a
self-made man who has advanced in his career by almost catching the
infamous and suspiciously never-seen burglar Auguste Loup on several occasions –
which seems excessively suspicious to Dusk, especially when a friendly bout in
the fencing salle reveals Jacquard is adept at ungentlemanly fighting
arts like savate. She decides to play
along with the investigation.
It turns out that Uncle Merteuil is a crony of Dauphine Celestine, and
further investigation shows that Comtesse le Blanc is wealthy enough to greatly
bolster the waning royal coffers (allowing the royal family to avoid raising
taxes on the resentful peasantry). Dusk
wonders why Martine is not just married off to the kindly François if Celestine is
after the money, but realizes that would mean Celestine would not directly
control the fortune. She then suspects
that Celestine means to aid Merteuil in murdering his niece and then marry him
for the fortune, but Merteuil is… um… gross… and it doesn’t seem likely that
the fashionable young dauphine would want to marry such a man. Dusk realizes that Celestine means to murder
the both of them and then the le Blanc estates will default to the crown.
Princess Dusk attends the masquerade as the Pendragon, the foundling founder
of the royal “family” of Albion, in an excessively clever costume that
incorporates actual armor and hides her rapier in a decorative sword; Beatrix
the modiste is quite proud of her creation.
The dauphine attends in a similarly-armored costume as Melusine, de
Carabas comes as a furry-chested Apollo, le Blanc is Snow White while her uncle
is Robin Hood, and a mystery man (whom Dusk assumes is Auguste Loup) attends as
a Wild Huntsman wearing an oddly-familiar dog wolf-skin. Dusk certainly
seems to finally begin to enjoy herself in this gravel-voiced mystery man’s company.
A seemingly-drunken man in a pirate costume jostles de Carabas; Dusk
notices he is armed with two pistols – very real, well-used pistols – and remembers
that de Carabas’ would-be killer shot at the ailuromorph. Noticing that le Blanc and her evil uncle are
waltzing together in a false show of familial piety, Dusk concludes that the
ex-Marquis is going to “accidentally” shoot Martine and Merteuil while firing
on Tomás. She and the Wild Huntsman move to intercept
but are too late. Merteuil is fatally
wounded, but the Huntsman’s cloak leaps from his shoulders to become Raoul the wolf
dog, who takes the bullet for his mistress… and then coughs it up, unharmed,
because he is in fact a spirit animal.
Chief Inspector Jacquard reveals that he is a practicing shaman and sent
the wolf to protect the maiden.
He also reveals he is, in fact, Auguste Loup (which doesn’t really
surprise Princes Dusk, but she seems rather happy about the reveal).
Princess Dusk does not dress like Matoi Ryuko. |
And then Princess Dusk kicks Dauphine Celestine’s ass. A dying more-or-less confession prompted from Merteuil allows Dusk to lay the accusation of murder at Celestine’s feet; Celestine replies with a challenge to trial by combat. Dusk invokes her power of noblesse oblige and leaps into the battle. The duel is tense, but Celestine is hampered by her ungainly costume, while Beatrix has designed Dusk’s dress for optimum mobility. Dusk disarms the murderess and turns her over to the King f Gallia for judgment.
The King of Gallia, obese and slow as he may be, is nevertheless a man of
honor and condemns his daughter and the ex-Marquis de Carabas (the “ogre” Tomás
tricked out of his title) to imprisonment in the Bastille. Prince François is promoted to dauphin and
his engagement to Martine is announced -- with a press-distracting wedding in
two weeks. Dusk will act as maid of
honor. Auguste Loup disappears.
Princess Dusk finds a nice hotel and makes plans to move out of
Versailles the next day. She finds a
note under her pillow, though, and goes to it the next day. It’s an unassuming upscale brownstone, which
she swiftly learns is Loup’s secret Paris base.
He invites her to join him on a jaunt to Marseilles, and asks for her
advice on his wardrobe. “Which do you
prefer?” he asks, “The red jacket or the green jacket?”
She answers red.
Lupin III as ArsÚne Lupin by Tojosaka666 |
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